"A mystery novel about existential depression!"
Truths I Didn't Tell You, by Kelly Rimmer.
One of my favorite books for 2022 was Truths I Never Told You by Kelly Rimmer, published by Dioptra Editions, and I will explain why.
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I am alone in a large family these days and this is the worst feeling I have ever experienced. Until a few years ago, I had no idea that loneliness is worse than sorrow.
When her father is transferred to an elderly care unit, Beth volunteers to empty the family home and then discovers with surprise that the door to the attic where she used to play with her siblings is locked. Even greater is her surprise when she discovers what is hidden behind it - a chaos of her father's paintings, stacks of discarded papers, and many useless things in their otherwise meticulously arranged house.
Clearing the mess, she finds a diary page, written in her mother's distinctive handwriting. Everyone knows that Grace was killed in a car accident, but this manuscript brings to light a much more gloomy version. Quickly, Beth forms a different and disturbing image of her family: her mother suffered from chronic depression and her husband bore little resemblance to the loving father she and her siblings knew…
First, let's look at the plot:
1957-1996. Grace and Beth.
Two different women, two different generations, who unknowingly share a lot of things. When Beth's father is transferred to an elderly care facility, she discovers old letters in the attic of his house in the form of her mother's diary, Grace, who died when she was young. The more she reads, the more she finds herself in these letters, and as much as what she reads scares her, it also makes her feel less alone, more normal. Her mother wrote about her dark thoughts, about how motherhood caused her unhappiness. About how she couldn't stand being inside the house, couldn't bear to hear her children cry while at the same time couldn't bear herself for having these thoughts. "Motherhood has made me feel desperate and exhausted, and I am trapped here by my fears and failures. Like the skin on my belly after so many pregnancies - so close to each other - I feel like I have stretched so much that it is impossible to return to the state I should be in." When Beth's siblings learn about the situation, they start digging deeper into the past, finding a bunch of hidden truths that were never spoken. Truths that can change everything they knew about their lives.
A book that - I don't know how - I read in just one day.
It has:
Short chapters
Descriptive writing that flows effortlessly and
A topic so interesting that it makes it impossible to put it down
Women can find themselves in this book, and men can get a small idea of how difficult it is to be a mother - and a woman.
Beyond the topic of postpartum depression, however, other important issues are addressed such as loss, abortion, and human relationships in general, so you understand that it is a relatively heavy book.
However, in my opinion, it is definitely worth reading 100% [unless you are pregnant, then leave it for later].
Obviously, I gave it a 5/5.
I would really love to see more books by this author translated!
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